Say it, and say it proudly

What would you say to your crush if you had the chance to do so?

That's the question I got asked by my friend earlier today, and truthfully speaking, I wouldn't know. Not because I am clueless or don't have any emotions but because when I would be around him I would be all but smiles and laughter, it was always a good time with him because we would joke around and I would be such a weirdo when I would hang out with him. But if I had to have a serious talk with him it would be this: get over your trust issues. Although he didn't specifically say it, I could tell that he still had some trust issues over his past relationships, and it's okay because so did I. Everyone has had at least one bad past relationship but its not the end of the world.

I truthfully wanted a chance. That's all. Nothing more nothing less .

If I were to have been given that chance, he would of seen the real me. The real Stephanie. When I like someone, I am a completely different person. I tend to be a bitch because that's sort of this big wall that I try to put up because I have been hurt by so many and I don't want the list to go on. So for the past months I was a bitch to guys whom liked me and my crush was the first guy I have liked since my ex so it was extremely hard for me to be nice because I didn't want to be hurt again, but I was regardless. And maybe it was me who push him into that direction because I was such a sarcastic bitch to him and was bi polar at times.

But all in all, I would of said this: You missed out, because although you did know me, you really didn't know the real me. You didn't know what I could of offered or what I would of done for you. I see that you care more about appearance than personality and quite frankly that's going to bite you in the ass one day because you're being picky. I like you for you and not because of your looks, nor because you had an awesome car. I liked you because you saw life as a joke which I didn't before, you taught me not to take life so seriously and to just have fun and live a little. You showed me that I could be happy without my ex boyfriend whom I had so much drama with . I liked you because when I was with you, I was always happy and forgot all the worries.

And I still do like you. . . and if you wanted to take things slow. . we could of. I would of waited for you. But overall, just a message saying hey want to hang out would be nice. . .